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"Pass the gravy."
"How 'bout them Yanks?"
"I wonder how much of this food is genetically modified."
Hmm...which line doesn't belong? The dinner dialogue at many holiday gatherings often fluctuates between strained and superficial at best--as most folks try to keep the family peace. This reality can leave the eco-minded in quite a quandary: maintain proper etiquette or exploit a golden opportunity to spark a crucial conversation? Then, as you sit there agonizing over the right way to broach a touchy topic, the person next to you suddenly blurts out something that makes your blood boil. Do you react or mind your manners?
When does it become more rude to be polite? Our overburdened planet is crying out for help but many of us are too concerned about offending to speak up. On the grand scale of offensiveness, I submit that being forward about eco-change displays far more green manners than ignoring, say, 80% of the world's forest being gone. Thus, it's time for...
7 Ways to Initiate a Potentially Provocative Eco-Dialogue
1. Aunt Betty sez: "If the planet is heating up, why is it so cold today?"
What you want to say: "Listen, you old bat, if you stopped tuning in to right wing radio long enough, you might realize how ignorant you sound."
Much more effective approach: "The term global warming can be confusing. Maybe if we viewed it as climate change instead, it'd make more sense because shifting weather patterns sometimes result in unusually cold weather in certain areas. But, either way, we just experienced the second hottest September on record."
Link for Aunt Betty: September was hot, hot, hot
2. Grandpa sez: "You eat what you like and I'll eat what I like. What we eat is a personal choice."
What you want to say: "I'm sure Jeffrey Dahmer would've agreed."
Much more effective approach: "On the surface, Grandpa, that sounds logical and fair, but reliable evidence shows that our food choices have a major global impact like, for example, deforestation. Lifestyle changes like avoiding GMOs, supporting organic farms, eating local, and going vegan can enable us to make the personal choices that benefit everyone."
Link for Grandpa: Your cheeseburger causes deforestation
3. Second cousin (once removed, on your wife's side) sez: "I eat whatever I want and I've never been sick a day in my life."
What you want to say: "Well, there's still time."
Much more effective approach: "I was just reading a post on Planet Green that explained how the meat-based diet can lead to cancer, heart disease, diabetes, and more. Would you like me to send you the link?"
Link for your second cousin: Diet-related diseases
4. Everyone's favorite sister-in-law sez: "I don't care what you say. I love my SUV."
What you want to say: "I hate you. I really, really hate you."
Much more effective approach: "It's not just what you drive but how much the car culture is damaging the eco-system that matters. At the very least, if you limit the amount you use your SUV by participating in car pooling, using the public transportation option, and riding your bike whenever possible, you just may find yourself loving these options even more."
Link for sis-in-law: Why cars suck
5. The niece who just started college sez: "My Environmental Science professor has gotten me totally into the green thing. Now I drive 40 miles each way just to shop at Whole Foods."
What you want to say: "Your Environmental Science professor could use a good kick in the butt."
Much more effective approach: "A big part of the green lifestyle involves staying aware of food miles. By choosing locally grown food, we can drastically reduce the carbon footprint of our eating habits. I'd be happy to help you find an organic market closer to your campus."
Link for your niece: Locavore
6. Dear ol' Dad sez: "Ah, the planet was here before us and will be here long after we're gone. It doesn't matter so let's just enjoy ourselves."
What you want to say: "Father, are you out of your denial-loving mind?"
Much more effective approach: "I also think Earth will exist long after humans are gone but what concerns me is how much our lifestyle is hurting so many other species. It seems unfair and even selfish to not change our habits when animals and plants are going extinct at such an alarming rate."
Link for Dad: Extinction is forever
7. Your precocious but sometimes whiny nephew: "Can't we please just focus on Thanksgiving and all the great traditions?"
What you want to say: "What traditions might that be, Little Timmy? Slaughtering indigenous people, perhaps?"
Much more effective approach: "Sometimes it's exciting to learn about new traditions like making Thanksgiving greener or even discovering other traditions we're not familiar with."
Link for your nephew: The annual unThanksgiving on Alcatraz Island (see video aobve)
3 More Links for Aunt Betty's Inbox
Video: Emeril Green: Emeril's Lentil Loaf
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