Gregory Schaefer Says: Olalliberries

Hello there! Gregory from G Word's "Ultimate Eco Cook Off" here with some thoughts on the organic and luscious OLALLIEBERRY!

Oh me, oh my, oh, Olalliberries. Odd name, odd little berry, odd shoot.

The night before we did the Olallieberry piece, the crew and I arrived late and hit the restaurant nearest our hotel. It was scary... like David Lynch scary. There was a strange pioneer motif going on and what must've been one thousand taxidermy animals decorated the place. It was really disgusting, they had all sorts of birds and deer and wolves and badgers...even sheep! Very creepy. What's worse, all the food tasted like it'd come out of a can—even the salad! Bad!

The souls of all them thar dead animals cursed us! I'm sure of it. So, it really wasn't a surprise when we arrived at the olallieberry farm and THERE WERE NO BERRIES! The guys in charge were like, "Yeah, didn't we tell you that we dug up the berry farm last year to replant?" Uh...no. I stood in the parking lot with the producer looking at this giant field of torn up earth, a few scraggly vines were all that remained.

Through the magic of TV, we made the shoot work. There was a small patch of berries growing around a fence—enough for us to get the shots we needed and harvest a few basketfuls. While we were doing that we learned the true origin of this local delicacy: THE PETRI DISH! Though the olallieberry is a celebrated, local delicacy and a great organic treat; it is basically a man-made creation! The little dudes are not wild at all, but a cross between a loganberry, youngberry and blackberry orchestrated by scientists at the US Dept of Agriculture in the 1930's. At least the name wasn't made up; it's "borrowed" from the Chinook language and means "blackberry." How original! Were we picking genetically modified foods on the Ultimate Eco Cook Off? Not really, but the olallieberry has never existed naturally in the wild. It felt kinda iffy.

The unease I felt was magnified when I entered the kitchen battle.

Chef Charles Aghajanian opened a can of whoop ass on me that day! When we hit the kitchen and he unraveled his abalone I knew I was done for. ABALONE? You mean, like, $100 a pound ABALONE?! Forget it! I nearly packed my knives and ran. But after having a few sips of the stiff olallieberry cocktail he made me, I decided to fight on.

I rocked out some really killer lamb chops and my olallieberry soup is a classic too—something everyone should try at home! But I feel sad 'coz my dishes really pale in comparison to the artistic wizardry of Charles.' Damn that guy's got skills, and his plating is magnificent!

So I lost this challenge? It's OK. I still had a great time cooking with Charles and picking berries with him at Linn Family Farms. Many questions remain though, why would a restaurant decorate with the carcasses of a thousand dead animals? And why did the USDA have to mess with the blackberry in the first place? I don't know, but I'm grateful as we now have this big juicy berry with less seeds and thorns. What impresses me most about the olallieberry is how it has become such a beloved, local delicacy! If you ever find yourself on California's central coast in the early summer make sure you go berry picking, get a slice of pie and maybe grab some abalone too!

More on Weird Berries:
Try a New Fruit: Saskatoon Berries
Drink Acai Berry

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